Slo mo ScoMo promo

We interrupt this reading for an announcement. Our new Prime Minister is Scott Morrison, a happy clapping clod who did a terrible job as Treasurer, following in Joe Hockey's footsteps and is typical of the kind of Liberal who puts his arm around your shoulder only to stab you in the back.

His deputy, who has been in for a while now and nobody knows his name, Nationals leader (as is the arrangement) Michael McCormack.

Last forty polls have predicted a wipe-out which may explain why Lucy and Malcolm Turnbull are hiding out in their New York apartment.